I'm a junkie hahah.. Anywho I feel good. I was thinking about my class last night and the teach was talking about christianity and it struck a cord with me . There is so much about this faith of mine that I did not know which is making me question the structure that I once believed was solid. Now I am not stating there is no God, I'm just questioning how he came into existance and who is He?
It hurts to know I've been decieved in a way all my life that there are other ways to experiance Him. Then I re look at the how the church is set up and how much it differs from what i have read about how the church was designed to be... My view is why go to a place where people dictate how the religion should be because no one is willing to challange it .. It kinda is like the bandwagon effect because everyone is doing it so should I. I don't think I should. So, now I am as this cross road trying to figure out why did I blindly listen to what I thought was right and not find out for myself all these years and what should I believe. That is going to take time.
I just see things differently even how I view myself to point.
How can people inclding myself just take things as they are and think that it is right or just, making it the standard for everyone? It is as if no one has the same mind we are just the same being with our statment that we are individuals but yet we try to conform to this imaginary uniformity.. Who am I to say that this is right but then again it seems as if I conform to what everyone else is if it seems right to me ..
I will basically need to take the time to reevealuate if this is the right way for me and then go forth with what is right to me .